Humility or Humiliation?

1 Peter 3:1-7

¹ Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, ² when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. ³ Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. ⁴ Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. ⁵ For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, ⁶ like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.

⁷ Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

This is a rather tricky passage for our modern, Western cultured minds to navigate.

 Firstly, we must understand that this letter was written to an ancient patriarchal society, so when Peter is reminding husbands to treat their wives with respect as the ‘weaker partner’, keep in mind that women were indeed weaker in that culture in so many ways, with little to no rights, disadvantaged educationally and financially compared to men.

So, what may sound dismissive of women to our ears can be understood as Peter actually calling the men to respect women in a positive way that was countercultural to the original hearers.

Additionally, in our modern culture the word “submit” can bring with it a sense of humiliation and subservience that may make us feel uncomfortable.

Peter offers some guidelines for young women that, at first glance, may feel rather gender stereotypical and restrictive to women. But the people of Jesus believed that everyone was made in God’s image. They valued everyone that society ignored, including women.

When Peter teaches women to be submissive to their husbands, he is reminding them that even within the culture that they find themselves they can still live with humility, dignity and honour, which ultimately comes from knowing who they are in God’s eyes.

Lord, help us to understand the beauty of knowing how valued we are in Your eyes, even when other people or our society doesn’t treat us with the love and respect that You intended for us. Help us to be focused on inner beauty, purity and reverence, not focused on achieving outer status.

Written by Shelley Witt